Sunday, May 22, 2011

Joke's Corner - Drive And Phone

While on the freeway in Los Angeles, I was behind a pack of cars. The last driver was on the phone and drifting all over the road. This did not escape the attention of a California Highway Patrol Officer, who snuck up behind her and said over his loud speaker, "If you cant's stay in your lane while on the phone, pull over until the call is completed."
Immediately eight cars pulled over.

- Greg Ash, RD -

Saturday, May 14, 2011

Joke's Corner - The Oldest Thing

My 12-year-old daughter asked me, "Mom, do you have a baby picture of yourself? I need it for a school project." I gave her one without thinking to aks what the project was.
A few days later I was in her classroom for a parent-teacher meeting when I noticed my face pinned to a mural the students had created. The title of their project was "The oldest thing in my house."

- Aimee Kent, RD -

Sunday, May 8, 2011

Joker's Corner - Goin' Under The Knife

I hate the idea of going under the knife. So I was very upset when the doctor told me I needed a tonsillectomy. Later, the nurse and I were filling out an admission form. I tried to respond to the questions, but I was so nervous I couldn't speak. The nurse put down the form, took my hands in hers and said, "Don't worry. This medical problem can easily be fixed, and it's not a dangerous procedure."
"You're right. I'm being silly," I said, feeling relieved. "Please continue."
"Good. Now," the nurse went on, "do you have a living well?"

- Edward Lee Griffin, RD -

Friday, May 6, 2011

Joke's Corner - Day Off

During basic training, our drill sergeant asked for a show of hands of all Jewish personnel. Six of us tentatively raised our hands. Much to our relief, we were given the day off for Rosh Hashanah.
A few days later in anticipation of Yom Kippur, the drill sergeant again asked for all Jewish personnel to ID themselves. This time, every soldier raised his hand.
"Only the personnel who were Jewish last week can be Jewish this week," declared the sergeant.

- Allen Israel, RD -

Monday, May 2, 2011

小小 - Little

          一丝小小的微笑 , 给人无限的欢喜;
          一声小小的爱语 , 给人无边的受用;
          一件小小的善行 , 给人无量的因缘;
          一则小小的故事 , 给人无尽的启示。

One LITTLE smile gives boundless joy.
One LITTLE word does boundless good.
One LITTLE tale gives boundless inspiration.
One LITTLE action brings boundless good causes and conditions.