Two atoms are walking down the sidewalk when they accidentally bump into each other. "I'm really sorry!" the first atom exclaims.
Nancy was Catholic, but her fiance, Chris, was not. Since my friends were planning to be married in the Catholic Church, Chris made sure to listen carefully throughout their prenuptial seesions. At one meeting the priest turned to Chris and told him, "Since you are not Catholic, we shall have the ceremony without Eucharist."
As part of his talk at a banquet, out minister told some jokes and a few funny stories. Since he planned to use the same anecdotes at a meeting the next day, he asked reporters covering the event not to include them in their articles.
I work for a security company that transports cash, and part of my job is to work with police if a crew is robbed. One afternoon my wife and I were packing to move, when I received a call to report to a crime scene.
At a workshop on dog temperament, the instructor noted that a test for a canine's disposition was for an owner to fall down and act hurt. A dog with poor temperament would try to bite the person, whereas a good dog would lick his owner's face or show concern.
The patient who came to my radiology office for abdominal X rays was already heavily sedated. But I still had to ask her a lot of questions, the last one being, "Ma'am, where is your pain right now?"
My sister's lack of sports knowledge recently became evident when we attended a pro-hockey game. After one of the home players scored, the crowd screamed and the monitors around the rink flashed: "G O A L."
My grandfather has a knack for looking on the bright side of life. Even after receiving the terrible diagnosis that he had Alzheimer's, he was philosophical.
The plane was only half-full. When an attractive young woman asked if the seat next to mine was free, my male ego soared. Soon we were chatting pleasantly, and she told me it was her first flight.
As a salesman, I was searching for a certain company in unfamiliar territory. I come to a likely-looking road marked with a small red sign reading: Industrial Center. I was not certain that this was the right road, so I drove back to a gas station to inquire.
My girlfriend took her five-year-old daughter shopping with her. The little girl watched her mother try on outfit after outfit, exclaiming each time, "Mommy, you look beautiful!"
太阳因为照射热能而给人温暖， 
When my husband visited our son, Michael, at boot camp, he found him marching smartly with his unit. Michael's father proudly approached the soldiers and began to snap photo after photo. Embarrassed and worried about getting into trouble, Michael looked straight ahead and didn't change his expression.
There were only two people in line ahead of me at the electronics store, yet the wait was dragging on forever. Finally the customer behind me muttered, "Mr. Hare must be on vacation."
We were celebrating the 100th anniversary of our church, and several former pastors and the bishop were in attendance. At one point, our minister had the children gather at the altar for a talk about the importance of the day. He began by asking them, "Does anyone know what the bishop does?"
Once upon a time, there was an island where all the feelings lived: Happiness, Sadness, and all of the others include Love. 
